Finding My Compass, My Inner Guidance System
When I say “finding” I mean “remembering.” Which is easier said than done in my case.
I’m not sure when I picked up the habit, but sometimes I don’t even remember what day it is or what I just finished doing seconds before. Which brings up another point. How does one remember after forgetting? How credible is the remembering? We’ll save that for another blog I guess.
Back to my forgetfulness. Could all this be because of short-term memory loss? Maybe a coping mechanism from my childhood? Whatever the case may be, the reason I bring this up is because I originally wanted to start this post off by stating how long its been since I started my journey into freedom, entrepreneurship, and building a business. Then suddenly it dawned on me that I didn’t remember.
A Rough Patch
About five years ago, I was married to Kari Cobb (now Kari Moya). One year before that I was working at Wells Fargo as a Personal Banker. I was making about $2000/month after taxes. I thought I would give banking a try since I have a degree in finance, but little did I know that banking had little to do with finances and more to do with meeting my sales quota. Needless to say I was unhappy. Knowing that I was getting married, I was committed to “toughing it out”so I could have money for the wedding and potentially build a stable career in banking. After six months later, I was happily married but still feeling very unfulfilled at work. My wife Kari, saw my disappointment in my work, and repeatedly told me to pursue something else that made me happier.
I quite my job and ventured back into Real Estate & Lending (which is what I did through college). Bad news was that I felt something wasn’t right…like I wasn’t in the right place just yet. This time I stayed committed to my new quest a little longer. Partly because I felt I was being too flaky. Two years later, work was still not resonating with me and I didn’t feel alive. I’ve always believed that my work should make me feel alive and purposeful. I felt neither with my work at the time. This time wasn’t my favorite or my best. I felt insecure, disappointed and without direction. I knew I needed to be in a different place emotionally, mentally and financially.
Money Makes for a Bad Master
Responsibilities often take precedence over finding a passion. And from a logical standpoint, that makes sense. A lot of people separate work and fun which means work has to be a chore and the chore is the way we pay the bills. I was feeling similar pressures to be responsible. I had a wife to take care of now, yet I still hadn’t provided her with any real form of stability.
I began looking for ways to make money versus looking for what excites me, what makes me purposeful, and what allows me to express my passion. When money is the only end result I’m interested in, I end up making poor decisions. Life becomes about numbers instead of experiences and expression. Ultimately I sabotage my own efforts, and miss out on enjoying the process – which is what it’s all about in the end.
The emotions, pressures & reality that I wasn’t moving anywhere began to take its toll. I almost gave up.
Self-Expression, Life’s Fuel
It was and has always been about self-expression. I almost wrote “self-development” or “self-growth.” The problem with that is that it insinuates that there is something about me that needs to grow or develop versus drawing something out of myself that already is there. Here’s a great quote that helps express my feelings:
Education is not accomplished by putting something into man; its purpose is to draw out of man the wisdom which is latent within him.
– Neville Goddard
What I believe is that we are all already perfect. We just need to shed more light on the good that already exists within us. That way it (the good/God), can express itself more freely in my life – to the point of consuming my entire being. Light is the ruler over darkness. Darkness runs at the presence of any light (small or large).
Finding Myself
This difficult time in my life I would label as my “finding myself” stage. It was clearly a time for self-discovery and reprogramming. I needed to change the way I perceived myself. I needed to change before my circumstances or situation would.
The good news is that I didn’t give up. I kept looking for my answers. And eventually I found my answer. Interestingly enough, the answer was me. However, I discovered that my error was in looking for answers first, when I should be looking for lessons. It is in the lessons that the answers are found. My lesson was more about finding self-confidence, self-reliance, self-respect, and fearlessness. Now that’s a lot of “self” words in one sentence. It could come across as egocentric. But its not. How can you give love to another if you’re not in a place that cultivates love towards yourself?
Ever ridden in a plane before? Before you take flight, you are given instructions in case of an emergence. You are told that when the oxygen masks fall down from the ceiling, you have to first place them over your own mouth/nose before helping any other passenger. Its important to take care of yourself. It will insure you will be in a better position to help someone else.
Being Supported
I kept hearing: “You love people. When you genuinely love people and the world, they/it will love you back and you will be supported in your endeavors.”
I believed what this still small voice kept telling me, and that is what got me where I am today. As I write this, I am on a plane headed for Maui, HI. I’m heading to Maui to celebrate my wife’s birthday and to do a little work. I currently live in Carlsbad, CA. I work with a great group of people, and have some of the best clients in the world! I often forget what day it is because my weekend feels like a weekday and my weekdays feel like my weekends.
I’m in the creative world now. I have found my place, my home. I’m around wonderful people. I make an excellent income, and my business is growing every month. Our teams make a positive impact in our communities. All of this in less than five years. There are no limits to what you can do in your life!
SUMMARY
- It all starts and ends with you (God & the very Life force that lives within you)
- Believe in the good that exists in you, your current situation, people & God
- Growth is about self-discovery (finding out what has always been there this whole time)
- God is in whatever inspires you and whatever expresses Love
- Forgive yourself, others, and God
- Take responsibility for your own life – stop blaming anything outside of yourself
- Embody that which you hope to become
- believe you are already that person (lifestyle, income, status, etc.) that you want to be
- realize all possibilities exist
- align yourself energetically with what you want to manifest in your life